Despite what it may seem, there is intelligent life on this planet. Here's proof.
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
- Name: Rich
- Location: D/FW, Texas
Born to a Puerto Rican mother and a pasty white daddy, Rich was doomed from the start. Looking like the love child of Joan Rivers and Ron Howard, his childhood and pubescent years were, well, rough. Developing a razor-sharp wit and really fast legs, Rich somehow managed to survive High School with minimal incidents, although there was that time he and his brother allegedly set a golf course on fire. After bombing out of Florida State University (without ever officially beginning classes, mind you) and squandering a perfectly good Music scholarship, Rich overcompensated for an excruciating rearing by joining the United States Marine Corps. Now a rifle AND pistol expert, Rich knows 137 ways to kill a man in less than 30 seconds and is awaiting the day any of his childhood opressors reopen their big fat freakin mouths. Currently living in New Orleans, Rich has a beautiful wife who is way out of his league and two children who thankfully look nothing like their father.